Tuesday, April 24, 2012

the one about our first marriage retreat

This past weekend, Rob and I got to go on our very first marriage retreat! Chick-Fil-A sponsored us and 12 FCA coaches from the Triangle to attend for free - what a blessing! (Another reason to love CFA - they love FCA!) 

It really was so refreshing. I'm not gonna lie - I was kinda dreading the cheesy talks/seminars and the forced/guided conversations. I'm gonna blame most of that on being tired at the end of a long week (it can't possibly be because I have a bad attitude sometimes, right?). BUT I think it was the best thing we could've done early on in our marriage. 
Family Life is a ministry of Campus Crusade for Christ (www.familylife.com). It was all very well-run, the speakers were awesome and funny, the sessions weren't too long, and they really did encourage very helpful conversations that helped us learn a lot and grow. I had a couple takeaways that I want to jot down to remember:
-Decide the "rules" for your conflict BEFORE you are fighting, not in the middle. Avoid generalizations like "always" or "never". Focus on one issue, not many.
-Hard times in your marriage will come. Be proactive in preparing for them.
-There are a lot of things in your life that are "good things" that can drive a wedge in between you and your spouse. Too much of any of the following: ministry activities (dead on for us), materialism, careers (i.e. ministry :) ), family dependency, etc. 
-Rob and I are opposite communication styles, except that we both like to talk more than listen! :) Ha! 

Overall, it was really refreshing. Rob and I are blessed right now with being in a really good place in our marriage. Our time together is easy and we get along most of the time. I feel like we are connected and understand each other. So these conversations were really great to have to prepare for when things aren't this easy and we aren't clicking as well. I think this type of weekend is great for both times in your marriage - to prepare and get on the same page, and to heal and work through difficulties. It was neat at the end of the weekend to hear testimonies from both places.

One of the best parts of the weekend was spending time with the coaches and their spouses! It was so fun to meet so many people Rob works with and hear about their ministry on their campuses. We all went to lunch on Saturday and I almost teared up hearing everyone share about FCA has impacted their life and ministry. I'm so thankful to be a part of this ministry!

I did a terrible job taking pictures but here is a totally inaccurate, tiny snapshot of our weekend :)

We will find hot doughnuts wherever we go :)

Obsessed with these nautical flags and need them in my home.

Fuddruckers for the first time! Love a good burger!

Ha I was really excited to see the state line on my iPhone map!

Cruising on the way home, windows down, listening to the new Summit CD! :)

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